Friday, March 22, 2013

INSANE, INSANITYVILLE OR SUGAR??


 I was just growling and circling my rawhide on the floor. You know spinning around on my head all the way around that thing while I make really growly noises at it.

All of a sudden, Papa forgets my name. He says, “You are Insane!”

I look at him with my head cocked to the side, my black eyes searching his face and try to tell him, “No I’m not. I’m Sugar…remember your sweet little puppy? Sugar is my name I say!”

I hear Mama and Papa talking and they say, “We don’t have to get up early tomorrow. That is going to be so nice.”

“Oh yeah?” I warn with my little puppy looks.

We go to bed, all of us in the same bedroom. I’m supposed to sleep on my pillow on the floor but I don’t stay there very long. I prefer to get up on the bed and snuggle close.

Ohhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhh……Papa’s back is bare. Licking ground for sure!! I tuck that little nugget of info in my brain and lay between them until they are both snoring. I head on up higher on the bed and my tongue goes to work. Lick Lick Lick.

Ooopss…must have been slurping too loud, ‘cause Mama woke up and pulled me off Papa and is snuggling me up against her body so I don’t wake him. Okay, I needed a break anyway.

I hear Mama snoring again and I notice her arm is bare. Lick lick lick. “She’ll never know. Wait a minute! She rolled over onto her side and took her arm with her!”

I’m really getting bored with this sleeping stuff. I’m going to pretend I’m a wild boar. “Grrrrr grrrrr grrrr”  I growl at the comforter and burrow my nose down into it, sliding the side of my body up and down the length of the bed between Papa and Mama. Hummppphhhh…they still won’t wake up.

Well, I like amusement parks and this looks like one to me. I grab my stuffed bear which is white like me and stand on Mama’s hip. Plop. I drop the bear off the bed and hear it go “thump” on the floor. Pretty cool. Let’s do it again. I jump off the bed, Plunk onto the floor and grab that bear in my mouth. Then I jump up onto the bed again, get up on Mama’s body and drop the bear again! Weeeeee…this is fun!

Awwwww…there’s my favorite purple ball. I nudge it against Mama’s back, hoping she will play. Nothing.. Jab her again with it. “Oh Sugar, not now!” she whines. At least she knows my name.

Okay, I crawl back on top of her and drop the purple ball off the bed. I can play by myself if no one else will play. After a few times doing this, I remember how fun it is to drop that ball down the steps. Plunk (again) I get off the bed and head to the hallway. I take that special ball with me. I stand at the top of the steps and let it drop. Plunk, Plunk, Plunk down the steps it goes. I run after it and get to the landing almost the same time it does. I carry that thing back up and do it again. “When will they wake up?”

Hmmmmmm…bathroom door is open. I think I ‘ll have a look around. YES!!! The TP is hanging down. I’ll just help myself. Let’s decorate the hallway. Look how nice this looks. I pull and pull. Lots of TP follows me into the hallway and lies in a pile. I wonder how it tastes?? Kind of just sticks to my tongue. I’ll spit it out.

Oh goodie….I hear Mama getting up. She comes into the hallway. “Look Mama, look! I redecorated!”

“Oh Sugar, “ she says, kind of sad. “What have you done?” She picks up all my artwork and takes it into the bathroom. “Darn!”

 Mama takes me outside. I run around and around the yard. Isn’t that what you wanted me to do while you stand out here in your robe freezing? Around and around I go making Mama lift that leash over her head so I don’t tangle her. I am really fast. See?

“You’re Insane!” she tells me. I stop dead in the middle of the yard.

“Insane? Not me. I’m Sugar.”

Back in the house and Mama heads into her office. After tangling a cord all around her chair I head back out into the bathroom. By the time Papa wakes up I have redecorated again, filling the hallway with TP. I think I’m getting better at this.

Papa cleaned up that art project and closed the bathroom door. “Party Pooper!” So I head back into the bedroom with my purple ball to drop it off the bed again. “Oh no! I can’t get it.”

Papa calls Mama in and says, “We need help in here.” There I am with my head under the bed, my rump and tail sticking out and my purple ball is gone forever under the bed. “There it is!” I grab it and run.

“she is insane!” I hear Papa tell Mama.

“I must be living in Insanityville because those two are losing their marbles! I am not Insane...I am Sugar!”

Monday, March 11, 2013

Squatters

We went camping this weekend. It has been way too long since we got to spend a weekend in our second home. We packed lightly, prepared food ahead of time, and away we went to Leisure Lake Campgrounds for a weekend of R & R.


Last fall I had cleaned the camper thoroughly before the cold winter. I knew it was ready for us with clean sheets on the bed, the rugs were washed and put back in, the cupboards and closets cleaned and in order.
But over the winter, someone else found all those conveniences too good to pass up. You see, we had squatters. They must have thought the electric blanket on the bed would keep them warm, so they nestled in. Too bad for them, I had the blankets unplugged!
 
When you get hungry you check out the cupboards, right? But don’t destroy them, please. The squatters tore up coffee filters (I won’t be leaving any more for the next uninvited guests-they can bring their own). They spread that mess throughout the cupboard, leaving pieces in cups, glasses and bowls.
 
They must have decided they needed to clean up after themselves after seeing the mess they made. In the bathroom they checked out under the sink for any cleaning supplies. Those were removed too because they would freeze and explode. They used the rags I left but not for cleaning.
 
The remnants of their meals were left throughout the camper. Acorns had been cracked open and shells and pieces of the nut were strewn all over the cupboard, behind the mattress, and in the bathroom closet. As we were near leaving Sunday, I found another drawer with an acorn but I didn’t have time assess the damage.
ALVIN!!!!!!       Please tell your friends to get an invitation before coming into my home. It is not a motel!